Shane Battier has gone and grown himself a mustache. As a Bulls fan I don’t like anyone on the Heat as they are whiny babies but at least now I can respect someone’s facial hair, unlike LeBron’s straight Amish beard. Go Bulls!
Dennis Rodman, former basketball player, costar of Double Team, and all around goofball is now supposedly an FBI informant regarding North Korea. I guess it’s not that crazy since he is friends with Kim Jong-un. It is, however, a bit disconcerting that the FBI is counting on a former cast member of Celebrity Rehab to give them intelligence to help with national security.
I’ve had this picture saved on my computer since January 31, 2013 and thought it would be there forever. It didn’t seem like being a former basketball player and current analyst for the Chicago Bulls was gonna be enough to get him on steeshes.com. But then he PUNCHED A COWORKER. I made a bingo!
According to ESPN, Derrick Rose is not 100% physically due to some burning in his hamstrings. Also according to ESPN, Derrick Rose is a middle-aged white man with a mustache. Just kidding guys. I think this is an ad. We’re just having fun over here. It’s just for fun.
Happy 50th Birthday Charles Barkley! Sometimes I forget that Barkley was more than a funny, outspoken player. He is a member of the NBA Hall of Fame He was an NBA MVP, a gold medalist on the Dream Team, an 11 time All-Star and finished his career with over 20,000 points, 10,000 rebounds and 4.000 assists. According to this picture, he also enjoyed going to see adult movies in the theater.
Last night, JaVale McGee of the Denver Nuggets threw himself an alley-oop off the backboard and then celebrated by giving himself a finger steesh. I’ve never heard of JaVale McGee, and frankly I think saying his name aloud makes me sound like I’m having a stroke, but I can become a fan if he does more stuff like that.
Here’s the video:
Cliff “Good News” Levingston carried the Chicago Bulls to 2 NBA Championships in the early 90s.
Here’s a weird fact about Cliff:
“In 1986, while playing for the Hawks, Levingston had the rare distinction of “fouling into” an NBA game in a game. In a game where Dominique Wilkins and Antoine Carr were injured, Kevin Willis, Scott Hastings, Spud Webb and Levingston fouled out of the game. After Doc Rivers was ejected, the Hawks were down to only four players. Under an obscure rule, Levingston, the last player to foul out, was allowed to come back into the game at the cost of a technical foul.”
The Hawks decided to pass when they realized Cliff would be coming back in and just played with 4.
Anthony Davis is the first round pick of the 2012 NBA draft by the New Orleans Hornets. It appears that Anthony not only has a mustache above his lip, he has one about his eyes.
His face is also a math equation. His mouth is greater than his nose plus his eyes which is less than his forehead - mouth > (nose + eyes) < forehead.
Yesterday, a player that surprisingly wasn’t Andres Nocioni took a cheap shot at Carmelo Anthony’s beans. The Washington Post decided that need a write-up with interviews and all. Believe it or not, Carmelo didn’t think it was called for.
Here’s a video of someone’s tv:
It’s not smart to drink and drive. Jason Kidd did just that this weekend, resulting in a smashed up car and an arrest. Luckily for him he didn’t kill himself or injury anyone. He’s been making millions of dollars for the last 18 years. He has no excuse for not hiring a car service, or a helicopter, or a very large man to carry him around like Uncle Jack did in Arrested Development:
This article says that he was so drunk he needed to be carried to his car, so congratulations to the idiots who carried him out to his car and let him drive home.
Clyde “The Glide” Drexler played in the NBA from 1983 to 1998, mostly for the Portland Trailblazers, as well as a few years with the Houston Rockets to round out his career. He won a championship with the Rockets in 1995, but it really doesn’t count since Jordan took that year off to play baseball and gamble.
Clyde was a ten-time All-Star and member of the Basketball Hall of Fame, the NBA named him one of basketball’s fifty greatest players as of 1996. He was part of the 1992 USA Basketball ”Dream Team.” I watched the documentary on said team last night and believe you me, there are more steeshes to come from that film.
Larry Bird, the man that is pictured above with a blonde mustache, called the Indiana Pacers “soft” after they lost to the Miami Heat last night by 32. A funny thing to say for someone whose mustache has the subtitle “Ghost Protocol”, I’d have to assume.
Personally I’d like both of these teams to beat the shit out of each other. I can’t stand either of them. I’d describe how horrible they are, but my articulate cousin already had this to say, ”You know the Heat are a bunch of turd cutters when everyone is cheering for the Pacers who are a solid collection of dildos themselves.”
Not a good day to be featured on this site. First a basketball playing criminal, then a sports writing scammer, and now a retired football player found dead.
Junior Seau has been found dead in his home where police are investigating a shooting (suicide?). This is according to Yahoo, who is siting TMZ. I think everyone just sites TMZ in case they get one wrong, in hopes of some one suing them for everything they have and getting their terrible show taken off the air.
My cousin thinks he was shot to death for over-celebrating every tackle like he just won the super bowl. I don’t know how he lives with himself.
Jayson Williams was an NBA player and a criminal. If you look at his wikipedia page, the list of crimes is longer than the list of his NBA accomplishments:
Injury ended his career
Fired semiautomatic weapon
Covered up a shooting
Ron Artest, who is unstable enough to legally change his name to Metta World Peace, was back at it again yesterday. He supplied an unwarranted, knock-out elbow to the OKC Thunder’s James Harden. This is coming from a man who once started a brawl with fans in Detroit, so it’s not much of a surprise.
This is the elbow if you haven’t seen it yet:
I feel like it would be an agonizing process to try to order take-out with Dwight Howard. He would talk all about how he wanted Chinese food and once you find the menu for the place with the good egg rolls he’d decide what he really wants is pizza. So you’d figure out where to order the pizza and discuss what you wanted on it (Dwight, I don’t want any fucking onions on my pizza). Then this guy starts talking fried rice again. I just imagine it getting to about 9pm and we are both eating cereal without milk because the milk in the fridge is expired.
Reggie Theus has played and coached in both the NCAA and NBA. When you ask his mother what he is famous for, she will tell you that he was on Hang Time.