Maybe it’s just me, but for me, getting a valentine from Ron Swanson would be like getting one from the captain of the football team. Or no… I mean captain of the cheerleading squad. Yeah like from a cheerleader. Knibb High football rules!
So here is something that has little to do with mustaches, but might be fun to look at. I’ve made a number of nonsensical pictures in my day, but this Country Grammar/Kelsey Grammer mash-up might be the most ridiculous.
Any free time I encounter at work I spend listening to my office-mates talking about the weather.
This is something that was said just 1 minute ago, “It’s snowing outside. Was it supposed to snow today?”
If I had to guess, I’d say it was supposed to snow today seeing as it is snowing today..
It’s always cold in my office. Always.
I fear that my coworkers call me “Nips” or “PowerPoints” behind my back due to the previously mentioned cold conditions in my office.
How can my armpits sweat when it’s so cold in here?
I’m serious. I’ve used “prescription strength” antiperspirant before and that does nothing. It might have even made them more immune to other antiperspirants.
I often wear colors that mask the appearance of the sweat. I find white works best, and I make a point to only wear white shirts to weddings after a pretty embarrassing Blue-Shirt incident in the summer of 2011.
So yeah, things have been going on the past 8 months. You can understand why I haven’t posted anything. I think I’ll start making some post soon that have to do with mustaches and whatever else seems like it might be appropriate.
Zach Galifianakis, cousin or brother to Seth Galifianakis, trimmed his trademark beard into a mustache, accompanied by some chin-business. And I sure never imagined I’d be typing that sentence back in 2003 when I was a fresh-faced, wide-eyed freshman in college. The future was bright and I was going to really be something. But here we are.
For some reason I am getting a Bertram Cooper vibe from Zack here. Maybe if they make a Mad Men Babies he can play a young Bert.
Comedian and podcaster Marc Maron has a new show on Friday nights on IFC called Maron that has been on a for a few weeks. I was able to catch up on it this weekend and to my delight got to see both Maron and fellow comedian Dave Foley with a couple of nice steeshes.
Maron, much like Louis C.K.’s Louie, follows a fictionalized Maron. Even though it’s not as good as the old shows on the TGIF lineup, it pretty good entertainment for a Friday night show.
David Krumholtz has appeared in 69 movies and tv shows since his debut in the 1993 Michael J. Fox movie Life With Mikey. Among other things, he was in The Santa Clause, Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, and was even the lead in the show Numb3rs that lasted 6 seasons on CBS. Still, I remember him as Barry Corman “The Cereal King” from his first role. Sure he was kind of a jerk, but you have to respect any child that wears a scarf.
60 Minutes Sports had a very cool story on Professional Darts in England. According to the story, Phil “The Power” Taylor is the Michael Jordan of darts. All of his titles are too long to list, so go here if you have a lot of time on your hands (you do because you’re reading this already).
The above picture is a much younger Phil than he appears today, but you gotta love that quaffed hair/steesh/chest hair combo he was rocking back in the 80’s! Phil said he’s made millions of dollars over the years and his arm is insured for $15 million.
I’ve caught darts on tv a few times and it’s always exciting to hear the announcers and crowd going bananas, but the 60 Minutes piece made going to a darts match look more fun than any other sporting event I’ve ever attended.
I guess if something gets popular enough porn is going to parody it. Porks and Recreation does just that to Parks and Recreation. I didn’t watch the trailer because I’m at work and I want to be able to come back tomorrow, but you can get it here.
I don’t think I’d even care to watch it. It’s a damn shame that the merging of Ron Swanson and pornography couldn’t even yield a real mustache.
It once felt like it would never get here, but in reality time is just going at the same rate for ever so only a dummy would think that it would never get here. Anyway, we’ll get us some fresh Tobias coming our way on May 26th.
Carlos Villanueva is a pitcher for the Chicago Cubs. He’s had a terrific start to the season thus far and it has absolutely everything to do with his stylish steesh. It’s refreshing to see a nice mustache on an MLB player after having to look at Joba Chamberlain and Ian Desmond during spring training.
Allan Arbus was a photography and actor, best known for playing Major Sidney Freedman on M*A*S*H. The New York Times described his character by saying, “He treated wounds of the psyche much as Capt. Hawkeye Pierce treated surgery patients: with a never-ending string of zingers.” He’s probably glad he was unable to read that. Rest in peace and rest in steesh.
Louis Zorich is an actor, probably most recognizable to you for playing Pete in The Muppets Take Manhattan or Paul Reiser’s dad in Mad About You, depending on if you like great movies or bad TV shows. Here’s Pete giving Kermit the Frog a life lesson:
Today is actress Rooney Mara’s birthday. When I received my daily celebrity birthday text message (standard messaging fees applied) saw this on IMDb I thought I better put a mustache on a picture of her from The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. And guess what?! I did it!!! You can see that very picture I’m speaking of at the top of this post. Enjoy!
It’s been a while since I’ve posted because I’ve been traveling around watching the Astros or because I’ve been lazy and no one pays me to do this so why should I waste my time I’ve been busy at work. Above is a picture that Deadspin posted last week of an Astros fan with what can only be a very time-consuming mustache.
Our favorite steeshman, Nick Offerman, was at it again the other night when he appeared on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Not only did he show off that perfect croissant-shaped steesh, he dressed as a chicken as part of the “Chickeneers.” Check out the video below for the all-cluck version of the Lumineers “Ho Hey.”
James Adomian is a stand-up comedian and actor. I saw him last night at Zanies in Chicago and he was really funny. I’d heard him many times doing characters like Jesse Ventura and Huell Howser on the Comedy Bang Bang podcast (he also appeared on an episode of the TV show on IFC). He’s not only hilarious, he has a great mustache that he described as the “thinnest mustache allowable by law.”
Trying to tell someone that you think a comedian is very funny can be tricky. I can recommend you go see James Adomian this weekend at Zanies in Chicago because he’s the funniest live comedian I’ve seen since Hannibal Buress, while my cousin Bryan would recommend you go see Jim Belushi because he’s the funniest guy he’s seen since Frank Caliendo. You’ll just have to realize that I have a sense of humor and Bryan has an “According to Jim” poster in his basement.
Kick Ass 2 has a red band trailer, and in that trailer we see Christopher Mintz-Plasse (I wonder if he has two moms or two dads?) with a steesh. Kick Ass was such a sneaky-good movie, that it might be hard to repeat it. The preview looks good, I just hope Jim Carrey doesn’t get all Jim Carrey in it and ruin it.
Adam Driver is a former United States Marine and current Television and film actor. He appears on the HBO series Girls as Adam Sackler (haha). Girls is a pretty good show but for my money, the guys are Girls are the best. I like Adam because it’s nice to see someone in their 20’s that doesn’t look out of place with a steesh or like he is trying too hard.
65-year-old Alabama resident James Bramlett, accompanied by his 43-year-old mustache caught a comically big fish this week. According to the this article, the fish weighed in at a whooping 70 pounds. The photograph looks completely fake because there’s no way this guy could hold up a fish that heavy until you realize it’s hanging from some type of blue rope.
We’d like to congratulate James on his big score. I hope he and his wife and his kids and his neighbors like eating bass. They are going to be eating it 3 meals a day for the next few months.