Tag Archives: Nick Offerman

Happy Valentine’s Day From Ron Swanson

Ron Swanson Valentine

Maybe it’s just me, but for me, getting a valentine from Ron Swanson would be like getting one from the captain of the football team. Or no… I mean captain of the cheerleading squad. Yeah like from a cheerleader.  Knibb High football rules!

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The State Of Steeshes.com

Here’s what’s been going on, and some possible excuses for not having posted on this website for 8 months:

  • I got a new job
  • I don’t have Photoshop on my new work computer
  • There is actual work to do here
  • My desk is situated such that people can see what I am doing at all times, and I think a lot of coworkers take their shoes off because I never hear them coming up behind me.
  • I’m typing this in word and then I’m going to paste it in WordPress.
  • There are only so many people who have a mustache.
  • There is only so much you can say about how amazing each mustache is.
  • Any free time I encounter at work I spend listening to my office-mates talking about the weather.
  • This is something that was said just 1 minute ago, “It’s snowing outside. Was it supposed to snow today?”
  • If I had to guess, I’d say it was supposed to snow today seeing as it is snowing today..
  • It’s always cold in my office. Always.
  • I fear that my coworkers call me “Nips” or “PowerPoints” behind my back due to the previously mentioned cold conditions in my office.
  • How can my armpits sweat when it’s so cold in here?
  • I’m serious. I’ve used “prescription strength” antiperspirant before and that does nothing. It might have even made them more immune to other antiperspirants.
  • I often wear colors that mask the appearance of the sweat. I find white works best, and I make a point to only wear white shirts to weddings after a pretty embarrassing Blue-Shirt incident in the summer of 2011.
  • I moved.
  • I saw Nick Offerman’s American Ham again. I guess I really blew it by not posting about it.
  • I broke another toilet seat.

So yeah, things have been going on the past 8 months. You can understand why I haven’t posted anything.  I think I’ll start making some post soon that have to do with mustaches and whatever else seems like it might be appropriate.

Parks and Recreation + Porn Parody = Porks and Recreation

Parks and Recreation Porn Parady Porks and Recreations

I guess if something gets popular enough porn is going to parody it. Porks and Recreation does just that to Parks and Recreation. I didn’t watch the trailer because I’m at work and I want to be able to come back tomorrow, but you can get it here.

I don’t think I’d even care to watch it. It’s a damn shame that the merging of Ron Swanson and pornography couldn’t even yield a real mustache.

Enjoy Your Weekend – Bowling Edition

Hey everyone, it’s the weekend! Please enjoy it so much.

Tomorrow I’ll go bowling. I trows ’em like Ron:

Sure this is an exact copy of a post from last year, but I only bowl like twice a year so get off my back.

Nick Offerman, Why The Hell You Dressed Like A Chicken?!

Nick Offerman Chicken Suit

Our favorite steeshman, Nick Offerman,  was at it again the other night when he appeared on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Not only did he show off that perfect croissant-shaped steesh, he dressed as a chicken as part of the “Chickeneers.” Check out the video below for the all-cluck version of the Lumineers “Ho Hey.”